Thank you for checking in on our family!

Moments August 27, 2011
Thought I would take some time to update everyone on our family.

Everyone is adjusting to having a new baby in the house.   Daniel is a blessing, our little miracle boy who has already showing his personality.    He just had his 2 month checkup and was declared “perfect” by Dr. Wichman.   He is turning into a great eater and sleeper, just in time for me to go back to work!  

Will loves his role as big brother, a little too much at times.   He is a “hands-on” big brother, always ready to help out with diaper changes and playtime.   He started preschool last week and loves it.   He too is quite a character and keeps both of us on our toes. 

Our lives are filled with happy moments, which we celebrate and sad moments that bring tears to our eyes.   We can go from laughing at Will to mourning Jack in the blink of an eye.   Just the other day, Will was singing, “You’ve Got A Friend in Me” from the movie “Toy Story” to Daniel, a song that Sam and I sang many times to Jack during his hospitalizations.   It brought smiles and tears all at the same time!

In a nutshell, that is what our life has become.    Raising two wonderful boys, reveling in their experiences, giving them the tools to succeed in life.   And at the same time, mourning our Jack, what would have been and honoring his memory through the fund that bears his name.

I always said he would change the world.   He isn’t here to physically fulfill that prophesy, so it is up to Sam and I to do it for him.

We have a couple of “events” coming up that I would like to share with you:

Royals Game:  On Sunday, 9/4,  there is a fundraiser for Jack's Heart Fund at the KC Royals game!  Part of the ticket price will go to our fund, click on the link
www.royals.com/jacksheart  to purchase tickets.  We will be sitting on the first base side, section 140 and tailgating in Lot N before the game.   Please join us for a fun day and help out heart families who are facing long hospitalizations.

Wear Red For Red Jack Robertson:  Jack’s 6th birthday is on September 8th and we would love it if you would wear “red” for him on that day.   It is our way of remembering him and all the things he taught us.   If you want, take a photo and email it to
info@jacksheartfund.comand I will post them on this website & his facebook page. 

As always you can email me directly at bridgetconway1967@yahoo.com if you have any questions.

Thanks for stopping by and checking on us!  
Bridget & her boys

Life's Blessings June 22, 2011
We are pleased to announce the newest edition to our family today.   Daniel Joseph  Robertson was born at 12:12 pm, weighed 8 lbs 7 oz and is heart healthy.    We are blessed to have this miracle in our lives and know Jack is smiling down on us today.   Thank you for your kind wishes and ongoing support!

Both mom and the newest boy are resting comfortably at this point.

Jack and Will's little brother is another reminder that life is both a blessing and a gift.

Thanks for checking in on our family.

Sam, Bridget, Jack, Will, and Daniel Robertson

Blessings December 26, 2010
365 days ago we lost Jack.   We are a hundred miles from where we were one year ago, both in physical miles and in emotional miles.

We are counting our blessings today, trying to focus on the positive rather than the all consuming grief that literally still takes our breath away.

We are blessed with an enormous support system which buoys us when we are down.   Emails, text and Facebook messages, phone calls, lunches, dinners, hugs and kind words have helped us over this past year.  

Our family continues to help us as they can.   Sometimes they don’t have the words to comfort us, but just knowing there are there is a blessing.   They are the forgotten mourners for Grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousin grief is not always remembered.   But they lost Jack and miss him too.    

Our sons Jack and Will are blessings each in their own right.
We were blessed to have Jack for as long as we did.    Outside of the 268 days in the hospital, he lived his life as a normal little boy, loving his trains, Blues Clues, reciting the alphabet, playing with his friends and cousins, the list goes on and on.   We said that we were chosen to be his parents and guide him through his journey as best we could.    He continues to amaze and inspire us as we remember his determination and fight as he battled all the complications of having HLHS.    

Will amazes us as well.   He is there to pick us up when we are down, provide a laugh or a smile when we need one and reminding us daily that life needs to be lived.   He has saved us, so many times.   We don’t know where we would be without him.    His continued loved for his brother, the memories he has of him and his ability to articulate them is a blessing.   We don’t always have the answers to his questions and share in his inability to understand why Jack isn’t here playing with him.  

We have changed as people, we have changed as a couple.   We both have grieved differently, but thankfully this has made us stronger in our relationship and as individuals.   No one outside the two of us understands what we have been through and what we have lost.    We are blessings to each other.

Over the past year we have marked holidays, anniversaries, birthdays and special occasions without Jack, dreading Christmas.    We decided as a family to not participate in the season and take Will to the happiest place on Earth.    The grief followed us, but at least we could find happiness in the joy on Will’s face.

Thank you for listening to us on this most difficult of days.   You are a blessing to us as well. 

Peace to all.
Bridget, Sam and Will

Jack, our hearts have yearned for you and our arms have ached to hold you each and every day over this past year. 
 
Your courageous journey with a congenital heart defect has inspired so many.   We remember your contagious smile, unwavering determination and compassionate spirit which captivated everyone who met you, either in person or through you website.
 
We promise to honor your memory by helping out other heart kids who face long hospitalizations through the fund in your name.
 
May God bless and reward you by holding you in the palm of His hand.

Love, Mommy, Daddy and Will

10 Months October 26, 2010
We are coming to the understanding that whether it has been 10 months or 10 years we will always miss Jack being a part of family life.  The way he created “confusion and delay” (a line from Thomas the Train) in our lives can never be replaced. 
 
It has been 10 months today that we lost him.
 
The next few months are going to be especially brutal with the upcoming holidays.  If it were not for Will we would skip the holidays this year and many more in the future.  The only thing we want for Christmas we can’t have and frankly have not had for the last two years (now going on three) which is for our family being together for Christmas.  The last two were spent at Children’s Hospital Boston and this year we are apart from Jack.
 
Looking at the updates from last year, we were filled with such hope for a positive outcome.  It was a scary time for us, one year ago, as we faced ECMO, dialysis, many more caths and surgeries with Jack.   We never gave up, no matter how scared or worried we were.   And he proved to be tougher and more resilient than anyone could ever imagine.   Unfortunately, that hope is now filled with grief, for we know how the story ends.
 
Fall has usually been a good time for us  with the boys birthdays, changing seasons, pumpkin hunting, Halloween and festivals .  This year it is tough.   If you think you can relate to how tough it is, think again.   It is a billion times worse than you can imagine.   Losing our 4 year old son after such a long and costly battle is absolutely overwhelming.
 
We do have had some happy times.  Will had a great 3rd birthday.  He got tons of presents – tools and musical equipment and a bird house house that he and his Da’y (Daddy) could build and paint together; he went to his favorite restaurant for breakfast (McDonalds); and had lots of family around.  As unbelievable as this sounds, since Will was 1 ½ when Jack left for Boston, his one birthday wish was to have Jack come home and play with his toys in the basement after the party ended.   He feels the loss of Jack too even at such a tender age.
 
This weekend we will go trick or treating.  Will can not make up his mind what he wants to be.  Today he wants to be a tiger, yesterday spider man, the day before a garbage man.  A couple of weeks ago he said he wanted to be Jack.  
 
As you know, we are keeping Jack’s legacy alive through his Heart Fund – thanks to the generosity of many family, friends and some strangers- helping other families who face long hospital stays.    The latest CHD’er we have helped is Dylan Wilkerson, an extraordinary young man who could use some prayers right now.   Check out his story via www.carepages.com (DylanWilkerson).  To date we have helped 25 families and in the coming year hope to reach out to many, many more. 
 
We appreciate you checking in on us and continuing to remember us.  
 
Sam, Bridget and Will Robertson
 
P.S.  If you are interested in keeping Jack close to you, we have Jack Robertson blue bracelets.   Sam’s niece Claire Stenson created these in honor of Jack to remind her to stay strong, to stay tough, just like Jack.   If you would like one, email Bridget at
info@jacksheartfund.com and we will mail you one.
"Carry Me Mommy" September 22, 2010
At least once a day a lovely little voice says, "Mommy, I carry you".
 
Which means, “Please pick me up, I am tired or I need to see what you are doing or I would like to get my little hands on something up high.”   It is a wonderful thing to hear.   I will miss it someday when that little boy grows up taller than me and no longer needs me to pick him up.

I sat in a lot of smoky bars in order to hear those words.

I remember when Jack used to say the same thing.   I would scoop him up and cradle that little bony butt in my arms and off we would go.   Me and my sidekick.
 
And when Will came along, I used to carry both boys at the same time.   Many times down the stairs.  Sometimes one in each arm, sometimes one on my back (Jack) and the other in front (Will).   Everyone holding onto dear life as we cruised around the house.  I loved that feeling.

It more than made up for all those nights sitting in a smoky bar waiting for Sam to show up. 

What Will doesn't know yet is that he really carries me, not the other way around.  He helps my sad heavy heart pick itself up and move on with the day. Reminds me that there is another life in our house that needs me, wants me and loves me unconditionally.
 
And that while my Jack may no longer need me to carry him, he lives on through his brother Will, who now carries his mom and dad each and every day. 

Another gift from those lovely Robertson Boys.
 
We are getting ready to celebrate Will Robertson’s 3rd birthday in a few weeks.   Hard to believe that my baby (or as Will refers to himself as “not a baby, but a little boy”) will be 3.
 
Please keep us in your prayers as we mark another milestone, another celebration without Jack.  
 
Thanks for stopping by.
 
Bridget